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Americans with No Abilities Act

Discussion in 'Government Offices and Programs' started by JackDallas, Jan 11, 2013.

  1. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    President Barack Obama and the Senate are considering sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many Americans. The Americans With No Abilities Act is being hailed as a major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any real skills or ambition.

    "Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society," said California Sen. Barbara Boxer. "We can no longer stand by and allow People of Inability (POI) to be ridiculed and passed over. With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they are doing."

    In a Capitol Hill press conference, former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S. Postal Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity without regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal employees lack any job skills, making this agency the single largest U.S. employer of Persons With No Ability. The Transportation Security Agency was a close runner up. Under the act, it will be perfectly acceptable to be in second place.

    Private-sector industries with good records of non-discrimination against the inept include retail sales (72 percent), the airline industry (68 percent), and home-improvement warehouse stores (65 percent). At the state government level, the Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record of hiring Persons with No Ability (63 percent).

    Under the Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million mid-level positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and performance.

    Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote a significant number of Persons of Inability (POI) into middle-management positions, and give a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

    Finally, the Americans With No Abilities Act contains tough new measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory interview questions such as, "Do you have any skills or experience that relate to this job?"

    "As a non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who have something going for them," said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, Mich., due to her inability to remember righty tighty, lefty loosey. "This new law should be real good for people like me. I finally have job security." With the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other untalented citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

    Said Vice President Joe Biden: "As an ex-senator with no abilities, I believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a good salary for doing so."


    Received via internet
     
  2. OldGaffer

    OldGaffer Governor

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  3. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    Typical Liberal response. This is why you clowns are Obama mushroom voters because you, like he have no understanding of the Constitution.

    Money bills must originate in the House. Anyone who actually went to school in the United States knows that. So you just throw out a bullshit response with no clue what is going on here, and end up looking like a retard.

    http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-250_162-57517160/senate-gop-blocks-veterans-jobs-bill/
     
  4. Craig

    Craig Senator Supporting Member

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    Where does anyone say the Senate introduced a "money" bill?

    Your link merely corroborates the fact the Senate blocked the bill.

    The anger is palpable and is causing you to bark needlessly.
     
  5. OldGaffer

    OldGaffer Governor

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    From your link:

    Even some Republicans voted for it., your wretched assholes voted no on a Veterans jobs bill and you claim to support the troops? Hypocrite much?
     
  6. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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  7. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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  8. degsme

    degsme Council Member

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    I don't think this is real. Obama would not pass an act giving cash to Conservatives...
     
  9. jammer

    jammer Mayor

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    Jacko, I see that you plan on continuing with your lying ways in the new year. I figured as much. You know that putting quotation marks on something you made up doesn't make it true...well maybe you don't considering how often you do it. Keep going down that road, you rightwingers are becoming irrelevant in today's freedom loving America.
     
  10. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    C- on predictable response.
     
  11. OldGaffer

    OldGaffer Governor

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    It was a good bill, it created firefighter, law enforcement and park ranger jobs for vets, what have the republicans comme up with for vets? How about not a [Unwelcome language removed] thing.
     
  12. Bo-4

    Bo-4 Senator

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  13. 888888

    888888 Council Member

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    JACK=LIAR as in above, because in a world that that someone can look like they can't do a job as well as maybe someone who looks likes they could, are often passed over in hiring and promotions will have someone looking out for them.
    And Jack we understand that old right wingnut BS that employers should be able to hire whomever they want and fire whomever they want should be the way of the nation, which basically means these people would be push aside as just not worth the effort.
    But we as a nation have the ability to say hell no this isn't fair, and if you want to operate in this country you must abide by a set of principals that are written into law.
    We understand jack what kind of person you are, you don't need to confirm it more with [Unwelcome language removed] post like the one above!
     
  14. Jen

    Jen meh

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    Okay, JD. I know this was a joke. But it does have a certain ring of truth about it. In a show of acceptance for the idea that ALL Americans deserve jobs, not just those who are trained and educated, I believe that Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer and Joe Biden should lobby to have the people who drive their cars and fly their personal planes and cook their meals to be members of that group: Americans With No Abilities. That would show us that they not only talk the talk but walk the walk.

    (yes. my post was a joke too)
     
  15. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    If those jobs exist then thay are already available to Vets.
     
  16. OldGaffer

    OldGaffer Governor

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    The jobs exist, but they need funding at the local level, this bill provided funding to pay for the jobs. What have you got against unemployed Vets? Nothing, I suppose, you just dont give a shit one way or the other, [Unwelcome language removed] em, let em starve, the Winger mantra.
     
  17. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    You're a [Unwelcome language removed] moron. It would have been just as easy to encourage companies to give priority hiring status to Vets; most companies do anyway. All this bill did was attemmpt to enlarge the bureaucracy and create more dependency on government. The bill was typical Obama bullshit.
     
  18. JackDallas

    JackDallas Senator Supporting Member

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    888888=Retard. In a world that that that someone can look like they they they can't do a job as well as maybe someone who looks likes they they they ca ca could.
     
  19. OldGaffer

    OldGaffer Governor

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    It is pretty obvious you dont give a shit about Vets and feel they should be "on their on", no matter if they suicide in droves .It is just part of the Winger Social Darwinism and dog eat dog mentality.
     
  20. 888888

    888888 Council Member

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    If they can do the job, their disabilities should not stand in their way Jen! So are you applying for one of those jobs Jen, as from you post I can see you have very few abilities except to be a right wingnut.

    My joke is the fact that I would waste my time trying to have a conversation with the likes of people like you and Jack, as I put both of you in the same group.
     

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