92 year old man caught in the bed with another woman!

[Cotton2226]

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court, on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
'Your Honor,' she began coolly, 'I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly.'

 

[MaryAnne]

LOL,Now she knows!

 

[ya-ta-hey]

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court, on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
'Your Honor,' she began coolly, 'I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly.'

Mr. Cotton,

A 95 year old guy goes to confession and tells the priest "I was driving down the road, and see these two hippie girls on the side of the road, hitchhiking. So I pick them up, and as we're driving and talking, one of the girls starts rubbing my leg, joking about the last time I had it. I joke back, she better be careful, because, there may be snow on the roof, but there is coal in the furnace. So she challanges me to prove it, so I stop off at a hotel, and one thing leads to another, and before it's over, I have my way with both of them, not once but twice."

The priest is very stern, saying "As a good catholic, you know what you did is a mortal sin."

The guy replies "I'm not Catholic, I'm Jewish."

The priest says "So why are you telling me this?"

The guy replies "I'm telling everybody."

 

[ya-ta-hey]

One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court, on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
'Your Honor,' she began coolly, 'I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly.'

Mr. Cotton,

An 82 year old guy goes to his doctor for a checkup, and the doctor asks if anything has changed in his life. The guy proudly proclaims "I done got my 20 year old trophy wife pregnant."

The doctor asks "as you sure." To which the guy replies "Of course I'm sure."

The doctor then says "Suppose you were out duck hunting, and out of the corner of your eye, you see a duck flying, so you swing your gun around, but pull the trigger too fast, such that you're sure you only shot the water because you see the splash, but the duck falls from the sky. What would you say to that."

The guy says "Someone else musta shot that bird."

The doctor replies "My point exactly."

 

[Cotton2226]

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?" "Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since." "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started...

 

[MaryAnne]

Mr. Cotton,

A 95 year old guy goes to confession and tells the priest "I was driving down the road, and see these two hippie girls on the side of the road, hitchhiking. So I pick them up, and as we're driving and talking, one of the girls starts rubbing my leg, joking about the last time I had it. I joke back, she better be careful, because, there may be snow on the roof, but there is coal in the furnace. So she challanges me to prove it, so I stop off at a hotel, and one thing leads to another, and before it's over, I have my way with both of them, not once but twice."

The priest is very stern, saying "As a good catholic, you know what you did is a mortal sin."

The guy replies "I'm not Catholic, I'm Jewish."

The priest says "So why are you telling me this?"

The guy replies "I'm telling everybody."

Now,that was funny.

 

[ya-ta-hey]

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?" "Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since." "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started...

Mr. Cotton,

On the same vein, after 20 years of marriage, a man's wife comes into the bedroom see him weeping. She asks what's wrong. He says "twenty years ago, you and I were just kids, when your dad walked in on us having sex. He took me aside and told me that I was either going to marry you, or he was gonna see me arrested and prosecuted for statutary rape. Well, we married, and now here I am"

The wife was moved, saying "And now you're weeping with joy because everything turned out so great?"

The husband replied "no, I'm weeping because I would have been out of jail today."

 

[Cotton2226]

lollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll good one my friend!!!