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Ed Snowden dropped 3 entirely new songs on the masses today!

Bo-4

Senator
MARCH 10, 2014
SNOWDEN DROPS FOUR NEW SONGS AT SXSW
POSTED BY ANDY BOROWITZ

edward-snowden-580.jpg


AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report) — N.S.A. leaker Edward Snowden surprised a standing-room-only crowd at this year’s SXSW by performing an impromptu set of four songs from his new CD, which was released online today.

The audience, which had gathered to hear Mr. Snowden answer questions about the N.S.A. and government surveillance, was instead treated to the first-ever live performance of songs from Mr. Snowden’s album, simply titled “Edward.”

“I made this music for you, my fans,” Mr. Snowden said, adding that he doesn’t “care about the haters.”

Listeners were divided about the quality of the eclectic four-song set, which spanned musical styles from alt-country to dubstep.

Music critic Tracy Klugian said, “Snowden is the most exciting new artist to come out of SXSW in a long time. It reminded me of the first time I heard Conor Oberst.”

She acknowledged that not every song worked. “Obviously, the duet with Kesha was a mistake,” she said. “But I give him credit for trying.”

Music journalist Harland Dorrinson was less impressed. “Snowden said it was new music, but I didn’t hear anything new,” he said. “In addition to N.S.A. documents, it sounds like he’s been downloading a lot of Arcade Fire.”

After performing the four songs, Mr. Snowden disappointed some in the audience by refusing to talk about government surveillance. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of the whistle-blowing I did,” he said. “But today I just want to talk about my music.”

Get news satire from The Borowitz Report delivered to your inbox.

Photograph by Barton Gellman/Getty.
 
MARCH 10, 2014
SNOWDEN DROPS FOUR NEW SONGS AT SXSW
POSTED BY ANDY BOROWITZ

edward-snowden-580.jpg


AUSTIN (The Borowitz Report) — N.S.A. leaker Edward Snowden surprised a standing-room-only crowd at this year’s SXSW by performing an impromptu set of four songs from his new CD, which was released online today.

The audience, which had gathered to hear Mr. Snowden answer questions about the N.S.A. and government surveillance, was instead treated to the first-ever live performance of songs from Mr. Snowden’s album, simply titled “Edward.”

“I made this music for you, my fans,” Mr. Snowden said, adding that he doesn’t “care about the haters.”

Listeners were divided about the quality of the eclectic four-song set, which spanned musical styles from alt-country to dubstep.

Music critic Tracy Klugian said, “Snowden is the most exciting new artist to come out of SXSW in a long time. It reminded me of the first time I heard Conor Oberst.”

She acknowledged that not every song worked. “Obviously, the duet with Kesha was a mistake,” she said. “But I give him credit for trying.”

Music journalist Harland Dorrinson was less impressed. “Snowden said it was new music, but I didn’t hear anything new,” he said. “In addition to N.S.A. documents, it sounds like he’s been downloading a lot of Arcade Fire.”

After performing the four songs, Mr. Snowden disappointed some in the audience by refusing to talk about government surveillance. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m proud of the whistle-blowing I did,” he said. “But today I just want to talk about my music.”

Get news satire from The Borowitz Report delivered to your inbox.

Photograph by Barton Gellman/Getty.


You know, Bo...Borowitz isn't nearly as funny as you seem to think he is.
 
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