Thoughts?

[gigi]

she bullied, stalked, cyber-stalked and harassed another girl. that would be a crime (a misdemeanor?) for an adult. she's a child so she needn't be treated like an adult, but she can be processed thru the juvenile court system where she would be evaluated and recs made. yes, I do have faith in the juvenile system and mental health professionals who work with these teens and their families.

This is the sensible answer.

You have way more compassion than I do. I'm too mad to even think about the very real possibility that these girls need help.
I have faith in mental health professionals, too. There are bad ones, like every other discipline, but there are also good ones, even great ones, too.

 

[gigi]

From what I saw in the news today the apple (those bullying) doesn't fall far from the tree. The step mom of one of the bullying girls is in trouble for abusing children under her care. LINK

I made a post last night of a piece by Dr Keith Ablow suggesting that the word "bullying" be replaced with "assault" or "psychological assault" and treated as a crime. I am moving toward full support of that.

Sounds like a good idea. That's what I'm thinking. Sometimes kids are just rude and say rude things to kids they don't like. But at some point, some behavior has be recognized as an all out campaign meant to terrorize.

Now there's another case in Texas, but thankfully, the boy hasn't committed suicide yet.

 

[NightSwimmer]

Forgive me for being somewhat leery of making verbal insults a crime punishable by law. Almost everyone that I attended school with would have a criminal record if that had been the case back when I was growing up.

 

[freyasman]

she bullied, stalked, cyber-stalked and harassed another girl. that would be a crime (a misdemeanor?) for an adult. she's a child so she needn't be treated like an adult, but she can be processed thru the juvenile court system where she would be evaluated and recs made. yes, I do have faith in the juvenile system and mental health professionals who work with these teens and their families.

You have "faith" in these people and the system? Why? Have you ever seen any of their work?

 

[JuliefromOhio]

You have "faith" in these people and the system? Why? Have you ever seen any of their work?

yes, I have....up close for over 40 years.

 

[NightSwimmer]

This is not the first case of a kid killing themselves and leaving reference to their acts being the result of constant harassment.

What of the suicide notes blaming the loss of a boyfriend or girlfriend?

Should we also prosecute kids for breaking up with one another?

 

[freyasman]

yes, I have....up close for over 40 years.

Well, I'm sure not going to question what you've seen with your own eyes..... but I sure wish I'd seen anything good out of them, because I haven't yet.

 

[gigi]

What of the suicide notes blaming the loss of a boyfriend or girlfriend?

Should we also prosecute kids for breaking up with one another?

I really don't know how much plainer to say what is on my mind. I've been talking specifically about all out campaigns some go on to harass and torment their targets, whether the target commits suicide or not. Someone breaking up with someone does not really fit the harassment, torment mentality.

 

[NightSwimmer]

I really don't know how much plainer to say what is on my mind. I've been talking specifically about all out campaigns some go on to harass and torment their targets, whether the target commits suicide or not. Someone breaking up with someone does not really fit the harassment, torment mentality.

No, but it can just as easily lead to a suicide.

 

[Hummingbirdlvr3]

Then they would be complicit. I don't think any parents would encourage their kids to pick on an innocent victim.

Encourage, hopefully not, (sadly I have witnessed same) but to neglect to do anything about their child that's bullying another- unconscionable.

 

[Hummingbirdlvr3]

The girl should be punished severely. I do not believe the parents should , Unless of course they were complicit. Some of the worst kids have the best parents, and some of the worst parents have the best kids. At their age it is peer pressure that is affecting their behavior. I am sure even one of two of us did things that we didn't want our parents to know about. As I said if parents are complicit that is one thing , but most parents unfortunately don't have as much control of their kids ages.

Your statement of "some of the worst kids have the best parents." - I have not ever witnessed that , maybe if you knew for a fact what went on behind closed doors then perhaps that statement of your's might have some truth to it. However I have seen children of bad parents turn out well thru no contribution of said parents, but 'despite' the bad parenting.

 

[Hummingbirdlvr3]

We have enough government. We have enough laws. What we need is personal responsibility and parenting.

Neither of which CAN be legislated.

Not when it comes to stalking, and bullying we don't! I would like to have the piece of mind that if my child were being bullied that I would be able to put a stop to it, and that the law would back me up. The way some parents are today, I can not rely on them to discipline their children. Sad but true.

 

[Renee]

Your statement of "some of the worst kids have the best parents." - I have not ever witnessed that , maybe if you knew for a fact what went on behind closed doors then perhaps that statement of your's might have some truth to it. However I have seen children of bad parents turn out well thru no contribution of said parents, but 'despite' the bad parenting.

Are t you saying the same thing I am? You have seen children of bad parents turn out well,,,,,as I have. What is so odd about.seeing kids with good parents turn out bad? When kids are teens, peer pressure takes over. I had a friend who supervised parties., Did everything right, but she didn't know they had a bottle hidden in the bathroom. And do I assume you know for a fact what goes on behind doors of bad parents since you accused me of that? I think working with thousands of kids and parents , and giving workshops for parents of teens, kinda gives me some inisights, you don't have to be so literal.

 

[NightSwimmer]

Your statement of "some of the worst kids have the best parents." - I have not ever witnessed that , maybe if you knew for a fact what went on behind closed doors then perhaps that statement of your's might have some truth to it.

I consider it true based upon having seen families with happy, well behaved kids -- except for maybe one or two of them. Same parenting. Different result. I've known fraternal twins who were like that.

 

[Renee]

Not when it comes to stalking, and bullying we don't! I would like to have the piece of mind that if my child were being bullied that I would be able to put a stop to it, and that the law would back me up. The way some parents are today, I can not rely on them to discipline their children. Sad but true.

Schools now are taking bullying much more seriously.....parents can discipline their kids, but they can't be with them in school where the peer pressure is.

 

[Hummingbirdlvr3]

Are t you saying the same thing I am? You have seen children of bad parents turn out well,,,,,as I have. What is so odd about.seeing kids with good parents turn out bad? When kids are teens, peer pressure takes over. I had a friend who supervised parties., Did everything right, but she didn't know they had a bottle hidden in the bathroom. And do I assume you know for a fact what goes on behind doors of bad parents since you accused me of that? I think working with thousands of kids and parents , and giving workshops for parents of teens, kinda gives me some inisights, you don't have to be so literal.

Some bad parenting is so blatant that one need not see what goes on behind closed doors. The crack head parent - the heroin addict - the parent whom goes out most nights leaving her teens / children unsupervised. As for those 'perfect parents whom you spoke of who have the worst kids' - most likely something is going on with the dynamics of that parental relationship that you're not aware of. Many parents appear perfect, but are not , as do many mental health workers, some are better than others.

 

[gigi]

Not when it comes to stalking, and bullying we don't! I would like to have the piece of mind that if my child were being bullied that I would be able to put a stop to it, and that the law would back me up. The way some parents are today, I can not rely on them to discipline their children. Sad but true.

This is exactly how I feel, Humm. Schools can't do anything about bullying that goes on outside of school. And with the internet and social media, bullying goes way beyond the occasional rude remak or slap session. AND......you can't remove your kid from the bully's proximity because the internet is one big place. Sure, maybe schools can stop the cruel treatment that they witness, but their policies are slow and ineffective and arbitrarily followed.

The police can't really do anything about these campaigns to ruin lives because these kids that engage in it aren't breaking any law.

And some parents don't stop their kids. Some, I'll say few, even instigate it.

So it'd be a big help if there was legislation that a parent could take to the police along with documentation of the harassment and say, "here's the proof of what's going on, here's the law that is being broken...please put a stop to this."


I'm all for personal responsibility but there's no pill we can all take that will make us all responsible and effective parents. Meanwhile, kids are suffering.

 

[resident_evil]

So this is the story of the 12 year old girl, Rebecca Sedwick, who committed suicide after being bullied relentlessly and terrorized (according to the local police) by two peers. The bullies' parents knew about the bullying and didn't take effective steps to stop their kids from tormenting this girl. One family still defends their daughter, while the other is very contrite and seems to really be grieving for their daughter's part in this tragedy.

Do you think that in cases like this, the guilty parties, if it can be shown that their bullying was excessive (as would be defined by legislation) should be charged with any crime?
Do you think parents who have been notified of their children's bullying antics but did not step in effectively should be held responsible in any way?
Yes, no, maybe....and why?

http://www.cnn.com/2013/10/15/justice/rebecca-sedwick-bullying-death-arrests/

Libel and slander should apply to the kids and 30 days in juvy for intimidation.

Tormenting my kid would get those kids parents in some off the books real deep shit if they didn't deal with it. Or at least it's a possibility all parents should consider when managing their kids offenses against others.

 

[Renee]

Some bad parenting is so blatant that one need not see what goes on behind closed doors. The crack head parent - the heroin addict - the parent whom goes out most nights leaving her teens / children unsupervised. As for those 'perfect parents whom you spoke of who have the worst kids' - most likely something is going on with the dynamics of that parental relationship that you're not aware of. Many parents appear perfect, but are not , as do many mental health workers, some are better than others.

No parent is perfect....that's silly. All I am trying to say is kids yield to peer pressure at a certain age and to blame parents isn't fair. I am sure there are many here who have had problems with their kids and I don't think they would want to be blamed. I bet one or two of us have smoked a cigarette, Had a drink, without our parents knowing. It is age appropriate often and some kids go off track. A normal part of adolescence is separation from parents. And that is where we keep our fingers crossed and hope that they take the right path

 

[Renee]

Libel and slander should apply to the kids and 30 days in juvy for intimidation.

Tormenting my kid would get those kids parents in some off the books real deep shit if they didn't deal with it. Or at least it's a possibility all parents should consider when managing their kids offenses against others.

Sadly many parents are in denial. The parents of this boy were on CNN and they just insisted that their child was innocent and did nothing wrong. This happens all the time . I have kids who were monsters in the classroom and the parents were stunned because they were perfect at home. And very often that is true and they act out in another place. And I have had kids with drug addicted parents Who made my classroom a second home and were eager to please. There is no set rule.